Good Morning. I hope everyone is doing well. End of February, already! We are under a winter snow storm warning, which lingers well into the entire week, so my guess is March arrives like a lion.
Currently Reading: "I Guess I Haven't Learned That Yet; Discovering new ways of living when the old ways stop working" by Shauna Niequist' I cannot remember where or who made the recommendation for this book. In the prologue of pages 1-6, I was quite teary for most of it; it hit a nerve which continued on through the first two chapters, but then the stories seemed to be on repeat & I was quickly loosing interest. Then I got teary again about chapter 20 when a few more nerves got hit. I haven't finished the book yet, and so far my overall opinion is a yes for me, although it's a book not everyone would want or need to read. For me, right time. One of the lines that meant something to me was on page 83, "grief is somatic, that it locates itself in our bodies & therefore needs to be worked out of our arms, legs & chest with movement, especially walking". Having myself recently in the last few months experienced the grief of loss of two family members, my young niece in December & one of my brothers in January. Neither of these deaths had any kind of service or remembrance celebration, which I am now coming to realize are important markers of death & life, which in my opinion help those of us left to grieve, to transition from the emptiness of loss to renewing the movement of life. I guess I was clinging to a grief unheard but felt. Maybe Mother Nature's wintery expression this week won't be so bad so I can get out for a cleansing walk. Treadmill walking just doesn't have the same oomph to it.
The other book I'm reading is a happy mistake. I meant to request The Cloisters, by Katy Hays, but actually clicked on the library lists, The Cloister by James Carroll. The little s at the end makes all the difference. Both are novels. I am only 31 pages into The Cloister & curious about Father Michael Kavanagh's past & why someone at the commune rail would trigger him to go chasing after him. I've yet to meet the other main character of the story, Rachel Vedette, a Jewish woman having lived during the war, in France.
Currently Watching: more Brit Box, a few were just 1 episode & went searching for something else. We have been enjoying an older series, Murder in Suburbia
And I'll leave you with this latest word I discovered; Spuddles (17th century) to work ineffectively; to be extremely busy whilst achieving absolutely nothing.
I certainly hope my week isn't going to require I use this descriptive word. Here's to no spuddling for any of us this week.
Yes, I suppose that some sort of goodbye gathering should occur. We are watching Inspector Lynley on BB. They’re older, and we have watched them before, but not for a long time, so they seem almost new. I *think* we were unimpressed with Murder in Suburbia, but I could be misremembering.
ReplyDeleteMurder in Suburbia was certainly a slower story line. I think it was a nice break from all the high dramas which we like so much. I am excited to know that the new Unforgotten drops this week & Happy Valley is coming! Like you we are revisiting some of the older ones like they were new to us ... DCI Banks is one for us.
DeleteI have to admit to being a bit 'spuddley' today. We had all the family over yesterday and it seems to be taking a while to getting everywhere tidy again!
ReplyDeleteI do hope you manage to wrap up warm and get your outdoor walk done - inside treadmill walking just isn't quite the same is it?
Mr Man has hooked up an old laptop & screen in front of my treadmill so I can tune into some uTube nature walks. While I am enjoying finding a good description of my days, spuddle is fun, but I need to work on not having to use daily (col).
DeleteNice word, spuddles! I managed to get the garbage out for 7 a.m., cleaned the fish tank yesterday. Life is good!
ReplyDeleteFor you Jenn getting the garbage out means a long walk down your driveway so I don't think there was any spuddling for you (col). Did your two fur supervisors help with the tank cleaning?
DeleteHaha, spuddles is a wonderful description for what occurs here on a regular basis!
ReplyDeleteI hope you manage some time outside this week.
I think spuddles needs to be re-introduced into our daily language. I may get a nature walk in today - it is always so pretty after a snowstorm.
DeleteI love the word "spuddles" lol It sounds like many of my days.
ReplyDeleteThe lack these days of actual gathering for services to mark a death is hard to get used to. I agree it's always been important in the grieving process.
Thanks Nita. I wonder if we think canceling funerals and/or celebrations of life, we cancel the long road of grief? As we are learning canceling the uncomfortable doesn't make it not felt.
DeleteI think I must be an expert at spuddling ... I certainly get a lot of practice!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to here about your brother and niece. It's difficult to get closure without the funeral ritual and I hope your reading is helping you to find your own way to come to terms with your grief.
xx
Thanks Eileen. Grief while a universal experience is certainly personal. I just don't understand the "demand" of no services. I think it makes it harder for all to mourn. Maybe because for many they think a funeral should then be the end of mourning & grieving. It's only the beginning. We need more understanding of the grief process. OK off my soap box.
DeleteOoh, I like that new word! Now, instead of saying I didn't get anything done, I can say, I spuddled!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear about the loss of two family members and the lack of a memorial service to bring closure. Maybe you can have a small private memorial service of your own; light a candle and say a prayer, perhaps. Or, that walk outdoors. I remember that I had a real, physical need to go for a walk when I received the news that one of my half-brothers had died; I was at the office when I received the news and I took a break and walked outside for 15 minutes. He was the one brother who didn't reconcile with my mother and me and I think I mourned the lost opportunities more than anything else.
Thank you Bless. I think many of us want to revive the use of spuddled (col). I have had some observations for both losses. You are right, these both remind me of not only gone too soon, but of family battles & splits. There is certainly no FUN in our disFUNction.
DeleteYes, another spuddler here. Sorry to hear of your recent bereavements, it's tragic when a young person passes and especially someone close like your brother. I have found "Murder in Suburbia" at my library and should get it soon. Perfect for winter watching, I'm sure.
ReplyDeleteThank you Chris. Murder in Suburbia is a very gentle (slow) series (only 2) but the friendship between the two detectives is what I liked.
DeleteI'm so sorry to hear of the death of your niece and brother. It's hard for me to imagine how devastating that must be. You're correct about the need for services or memorials. We lost a very good friend while we were on vacation (long before cell phones.) By the time we got home, the service was over. It took me a long time to accept that he was gone. I read Shauna Niequist's Present Over Perfect and remember having very mixed feelings about it. Little of it has stayed with me. It's snowing here, but they say only 2-3 inches. I just heard from my brother who live just north of NYC-he's expecting 6-9 inches. Take care.
ReplyDeleteThanks Karen. I think the loss of my brother reminds me how disconnected my family is & that brings its own heartache. I don't think I want to read any more of Shauna's books, at least for a while. This one I am reading could have been much shorter, she is just retelling many of the same "lessons" with different examples. We got quite a bit of snow, haven't been out yet to measure - the whole week is a forecast of snow & more snow.
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